With The Western Speed Cops

California Cops’ Columns

From the December 1925 issue of Motorcyclist magazine

“Hey, Officer, will this road take me to Avalon?” That’s what some motorist asked Tommy Lofthouse the other day.

Ray Honeywell is trying to outdo Red Grange. Next time you’re in Hawthorne ask him how about it.

At the time we go to press, we learn of the sad news of Officer Shermerhorn of Burbank. He was out after a fast one and his motor went down, throwing him under a heavy truck. It cost him the loss of one and may be both legs.

Officers Partin and Fetterhoff were riding on “Black Broadway” in Los Angeles the other night when a black-skinned car driver tried to run them down. Brother, there is more than one state they won’t try that. It doesn’t make any difference as to the color of the skin, anyone that would try that is black and ought to get what that bird is getting- trial for attempted manslaughter; ‘ats the way to treat ‘em.

Carl Andrews, the “chill bringer” at Compton, has just had a crack up. We are told that it’s another one of those cases where some fellow thought he could beat the cop to a crossing. Jail helps those birds, plenty.

Santa Barbara had another shake. This time is was only felt by the State Squad. Roy Gaylen of Kern County was made captain by Ed Bruck, who knew his stuff as an inspector.

Earl Hume, the man of many offices at Fillmore, seems to be so darn busy that he doesn’t have time to call on any of his poor friends. Besides being motor cop Earl is building inspector, chief of fire, police, tax collector and a dozen more.

The San Joaquin Valley has a trio of inspectors you’d be proud to know-Morrison, McCloskey and Holden. Used to know ‘em all when they were called by their first names.

There’s at least one guy on the L.A. cop house gang that’s loaded with horseshoes. That’s Officer Jester, he’s back on the job, recovered from a broken spine.

Well, it’s happened, Will Marsh sent his little playmate, Inspector Walter Greer down to Imperial County and told him to get a squad of traffic officers together that would reflect real credit to the State. Walter went down, rolled up his sleeves and strutted his stuff. His line up for the crew is Willahan, Williams, Brouse, Hunter, Kirkland and Knight. There is a lot of speculation as to who will be the new captain, but we kind of guess Cal Willahan. Walter Greer is smart like me so he probably thinks the same as I do.

Old Frank Wolters, who gains a living writing tickets over at Inglewood, wanted to get his name in these columns again so he picked a contractor’s car for a head-on collision. Now, this thing happened because the guy driving the car thought he could steal the right of way from a cop, so we are told. True to form, Frank went to the hospital with a broken leg and the driver went to JAIL.

Life seemed bright this morning. None other than my old friend Harold Loyd, the South Gate motor cop, came in to see me. Harold seems to be recovering rapidly from the accident at La Jolla.

Allan B. Monks discovered the highest mountain in America, Robert Peary discovered the North Pole but State Officer Ralph Williams discovered the first and only fog in the Imperial Valley. Smart boy, Ralph.

The beauty contest has swept the State. Johnnie Foote with his new powder puff is first among the handsome motor cops.

Johnnie Foote, Hermosa, 465.

Lew Stedman, Santa Monica, 19.

Harry Boardman, Manhattan, 12.

Fred Payne, Kern County, 2.

Fred and I voted for the same guy.

Were you at the Convention? Well, it was good. District Attorney Clarence Ward made a good talk That is only natural, when you know him. He’s real people! Another fellow made a talk; he didn’t go over at all except to Captain Hogan of Tulare and Frank Knox of Fresno. Laugh that off.

When you first meet Jack Flavin, sergeant at Alhambra, you might mistake him for one of Semetic descent…He isn’t, but one of that race met Jack and from what we hear Jack came out the winner.

Due to many requests we are considering a mail order school on “How to Be a Speed Cop.” It is apt to be a failure, according to Officer Coulter of Lynwood, as cuss words can’t be sent by mail

Last issue the Editor made two mistakes. He printed the name of a motorcycle in these columns. Next he got the titles on a couple of pictures wrong. Charlie Blair, Chief of Beverly Hills called me on that one. I don’t blame him; he has a right to be proud of his six motor officers and their equipment.